Wednesday, September 09, 2009
called for the second time, same thing wanting to know what exactly went wrong and what's exactly going through your mind. i do not know if calling was right or was it a harsh decision. but there was no answer. good or bad? i have no idea. maybe it's good u didn't pick up cos i do not want to know the reason behind all these at all. maybe the reason isn't important at all. all the issues we were having maybe be temporary, maybe be forever, but me giving up makes it all permanent.
i guess it's me being too idealistic with the thinking that if we can't be lovers, friends will be good. but apparently, it doesn't happen so easily and it is much more difficult than i thought it would be. it's really hard to put everything behind, when practically everything i do i can be reminded of you. was just talking with sherm abt my pri, and sec sch times and i just address u as my bf unknowingly until he told me i should change the way i address you because u are not my bf anymore. was stunned for a moment and i didn't know what to say. it's is hard but i know i have to just do it.
i have got through the past one month myself, maybe there will many more months of heart ache, but if i go through all these, it will make me stronger and grow? i know i will be able to go through all these because i made this decision.
i guess it's me being too idealistic with the thinking that if we can't be lovers, friends will be good. but apparently, it doesn't happen so easily and it is much more difficult than i thought it would be. it's really hard to put everything behind, when practically everything i do i can be reminded of you. was just talking with sherm abt my pri, and sec sch times and i just address u as my bf unknowingly until he told me i should change the way i address you because u are not my bf anymore. was stunned for a moment and i didn't know what to say. it's is hard but i know i have to just do it.
i have got through the past one month myself, maybe there will many more months of heart ache, but if i go through all these, it will make me stronger and grow? i know i will be able to go through all these because i made this decision.
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by jessie=] @ 1:37 PM
